


It's Not Easy To Be Me

by SaltyParabolas



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Gen, Oneshot, Songfic, a little angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-23
Updated: 2016-11-23
Packaged: 2018-09-01 20:10:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8636560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaltyParabolas/pseuds/SaltyParabolas
Summary: Lena is going to be okay





	

**Author's Note:**

> Song: Superman by Five for Fighting

_I can't stand to fly, I'm not that naïve; I'm just out to find the better part of me._

Lena Luthor hated flying.

Her mother told her it was irrational, that it’s the safest way to travel; her psychologist told her it was a subconscious reaction to her brother’s enemy. Lena didn’t care; her fear was there, and irrational or not, she wouldn’t let it stop her from doing her job.

She said as much to the pilot who was flying her to the park for the reveal of the change in her company’s name. She smiled despite her nerves at the thought of L Corp. Using her company’s power for good was something she had been wanting to do since she had found out about her brother’s capture, and the name change was the first step in accomplishing that goal.

_I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train._

She thought of the news reporters, their cameras flashing in her face, blinding her as they tried to get a statement.

“Did you know what your brother was doing?”

"Did he ever hurt you?”

“Was he always this way?”

Her mother had tried to make the attention go away. She’d used every contact she had trying to protect Lena from the media. But Lena always found that it was all people wanted to talk to her about. So she would smile and turn the conversation to small talk at parties, playing dumb and hiding her mind, a mind nearly as brilliant as her brother’s. Soon, people thought she was nothing more than a pretty face, a mere pawn in Lex’s games.

Well. They were half right.

_I wish that I could cry; fall upon my knees. Find a way to lie 'bout a home I'll never see._

As early as she could remember, it was always all about Lex. Lex’s grades at school, Lex’s achievements at work, Lex, Lex, Lex. As much as she was grateful the Luthors had chosen to adopt her, Lena often wished she had grown up with her birth parents.

The only one who made her feel welcome in the family, who made her feel important, had turned out to be a power-mad psychopath; so what did that say about her worth? That only a madman could love her?

Would she never be a part of a home free of power struggles and competition?

 _It may sound absurd but don't be naïve, even heroes have the right to bleed._ _I may be disturbed but won’t you concede, even heroes have the right to dream._

When Lena took over the company, the media went crazy again, demanding interviews and statements about her intentions and plans for LexCorp. They tracked her every movement, bombarded her after every meeting, invading her life as they had when she was younger. The sleepless nights, the planning and calling in favors were draining; dealing with the media was emotionally exhausting. She almost quit so many times, she lost count.

But she wouldn’t stop her work now. She couldn’t go back and change what her brother had done, but she could try her best to clear her family name. That was her dream. To make the Luthor name one associated with positive change instead of the fear it instilled in people now.

_Up, up and away, away from me, well, it's alright. You can all sleep sound tonight. I'm not crazy or anything._

Trying to convince Supergirl of her innocence was easier than she thought it would be. Lena thought it almost seemed like Supergirl understood her, even in their few encounters. Like she understood wanting to break free of someone’s shadow. Which made sense, she supposed. After all, how does one avoid being compared to Superman?

And it was comforting, to think that at least one person in National City understood that she wasn’t Lex. She was Lena Luthor, and she was going to make it. No matter how hard it was, no matter how lonely the path, she was going to be okay.

_It’s not easy_

_to be_

_me._

**Author's Note:**

> So, I really wanted to do a Supergirl fic based on this song, but the more I listened to it, the more I felt like it fit Lena more than it did Kara. Lena is SUCH a fascinating character I just had to write for her! I'll probably try my hand at something longer with actual dialogue later, but I wanted to try this out first.


End file.
